◢一對男女正在做愛,女的忽然跳下床,跑進廚房從米缸裡抓了一把米,回來搬到男的身上,氣哼哼地說:「少在這裡丟人現
眼,回去去把小雞餵大再來吧!」
◢好朋友,就像內褲,就算你大起大落,他也永遠包涵著你!非常好的朋友,像避孕套,永遠為你安全著想!更好的朋友,像
偉哥,當你抬不起頭時他給予你力量!
◢帝見妃愁容滿面,急召御醫。御醫處方:「壯漢八條。」幾日後,帝出巡回宮,見妃容光煥發,大喜。忽見殿前立八名瘦
漢,驚問:「何人?」御醫答:「藥渣!」
◢四醜女來世願望:一願做鮮花人人聞我,二願做雪糕人人舔我,三願作雪花膏人人都摸我,四願做救護車,人人都從後面上
我,我還可以哇哇大叫!
◢一農民尋花,花說:草地一次10塊錢,椅子一次20塊,床上一次50塊。農民拋出50元,花笑道:「先生好有情調喲!」農民
說:「情調個屁!50塊,草地上5次。」
◢一女子因胸小,恐嫁不出去;一日相親,對男人說:「我胸小,你嫌棄嗎?」男人說:「有饅頭大嗎?」女子說:「有!」
洞房之夜,男人衝出洞房,跪地仰天長呼:「天啊,旺旺小饅頭!」
Beautiful girls all over the world, I could be chasing (全世界的美女那麼多 我都可以去追
But my time would be wasted, they got nothing on you, baby (不過那只會浪費我的時間 因為對我來說 她們根本不算什麼 親愛的
Nothing on you, baby (沒有人比得上妳 親愛的
They might say hi, and I might say hey (她們可能跟我打個招呼 我也會回應一聲
But you shouldn't worry, about what they say (妳實在不必擔心 她們跟我說了些什麼
Cuz they got nothing on you, baby (Yeah) (因為她們都比不上妳啊 親愛的(真的)
Nothing on you, baby (N-n-n-nothing on you baby, n-nothing on you) (沒人比得上妳 親愛的(誰都比不上妳 親愛的)
[Verse 1- B.o.B]
I know you feel where I'm coming from (我知道妳看得出 我是什麼樣的人
Regardless of the things in my past that I've done (不管過去我做過什麼荒唐事
Most of it really was for the hell of the fun (大都只是玩玩罷了
On a carousel, so around I spun (就像坐旋轉木馬 我玩得團團轉
With no direction, just tryna get some (沒有任何方向 抓住什麼就玩
Tryna chase skirts, living in the summer sun (到處把妹 享樂快活
And so I lost more than I had ever won (所以 我失去的遠比我得到的更多
And honestly, I ended up with none (老實說 到頭來我一無所有
[Bridge- Bruno Mars]
It's so much nonsense, it's on my conscience (做過太多愚蠢的事 我捫心自問
I'm thinking "maybe I should get it out" (我想 "也許我該將它拋開"
And I don't wanna sound redundant (我不想讓它聽起來像是一句廢話
But I was wondering, if there was something that you wanna know (不過我曾想過 有沒有哪些事是妳想知道的
But never mind that, we should let it go (不過那都不重要 把它給忘了吧
Cause we don't wanna be a t.v. episode (因為我們不想搞得像在演連續劇
And all the bad thoughts, just let em go, go, go (讓那些負面的思緒通通遠離 把它們全忘了吧
[Chorus]
[Verse 2- B.o.B]
Hands down, there will never be another one (nope) (聽說接下來 你還會有其他的女人 (沒有)
I've been around, and I've never seen another one (never) (我看了一下 好像真的沒有呢 (絕對沒有)
Because your style, I 'aint really got nothin' on (nothing) (因為你的風度翩翩 真的沒人比得上你 (誰都比不上)
And you wild when you 'aint got nothin' on? (haha) (所以 你就可以任性狂野? (嘿啊)
Baby you the whole package (親愛的 妳實在太完美了
Plus you pay your taxes (品德高尚 內外兼修
And you keep it real, while them others stay plastic (當其他人還在矯柔做作 而妳仍保有赤子之心
You're my Wonder Woman, call me Mr. Fantastic (妳是我的神力女超人 叫我神奇先生
Stop- now think about it (嘿~好好考慮一下唄