Realistic question .....
現實的問題.....
 I have not depended upon ......
我沒有依靠.....
 to anxious go to ~ for the life to give up opportunity .....
必須為生活汲汲營營去努力......
 which painstakingly many men accompany......
放棄很多男人陪伴的機會......
 I actually being able not but diligently such brutal to treat oneself .....
我卻不得不這樣殘酷的對待自己........
 am not because your ～
不是因為你......
 is because of me must .....
是因為我的必須.....