I'm sorry....I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to keep it as a secret from you. But I just cannot say or do anything. How can I tell you what you hope will be a wishful thinking? Hearing your voice makes me feel so bad. Knowing you are going to get back makes me sad too. What can I do for you? I even don't know how to say sorry in person. How come everything makes me so sad? I don't know what to do either.....